Lots of food. Maybe doodles too. Mostly food.

  1.  

    Lemons

    I love lemons. 




    I am a lemon princess. 



    I want you to be a lemon princess too.  There are four variations of the lemon princess:  Lemon Princess 1, Lemon Princess 2, Lemon Princess 3, and Lemon Princess 4.  Download one or all.  You can put your head there and be a lemon princess too! 

    Lemons have both savory and sweet applications.  It is quite handily used as an acid in savory applications (just be careful that the lemon doesn’t overpower everything) and is also handy to make a quick batch of buttermilk/soured milk for baking purposes. 

    To 1 cup of milk add 1 Tablespoon or just do a quick squeeze of half a small lemon and let it sit for 5 minutes. 




    I always keep a few (hundred) lemons in the fridge. 




    Almost every single dessert that I have made that was originally vanilla I would tweak just so slightly by adding some freshly grated lemon zest.
     



    I love toe-curling, teeth clicking, mouth puckeringly tart lemon anything. 

    Here are some things that I’ve made that you might like if you’re a lemon princess like me.  I’ve made these before (multiple times) and they each have their own applications. 

    Good Basic Lemon Curd 

    I have eaten it out of the fridge, spoon in jar because I know I will be the only one consuming it.  It’s very thick, almost like a pudding.  I use it as a nice solid filling between cakes and cookies. 

    For the zest part of the recipe, I put it into a bowl with the sugar and rub the back of a spoon against the bowl, grinding the zest so that the oils rub onto the sugar.  I strain it out after cooking because I prefer a smoother texture. 





    Delicate Creamy Lemon Curd

    This is a creamy, delicate delight.  It has the texture of silk and can also be eaten with a spoon.  It’s soft, pliable and honestly, I found this a little bit too delicate to work with when incorporating it into layer cakes and cookies.  This is better used as a spread for scones or biscuits than trying to work into pastry layers.  




    Lemon Souffle Pudding

    This is hands down one of my favorite lemon desserts.  It’s from Joy the Baker, and this is  a no-punches pulled pudding cake.  It’s got a pillow soft cake texture that separates on top and a delicious creamy lemon pudding on the bottom. 

    You can serve it warm or cold.  Overall, I prefer chilled desserts simply because in this case the sweetness becomes more muted but the lemon is front and center and pulls at your hair. 





    Want more depth of flavor to lemon desserts? Feel free to add chopped fresh rosemary or thyme.  It balances the tartness of lemon with deep earthiness from the herbs.  I have also unashamedly added chopped fresh rosemary and thyme to cakes, cookies and curd.  I have no regrets.




    Lemon Bars 

    The above mentioned makes pretty good lemon bars.  My only quibble is that there is an equal ratio of lemon curd to crust, so in the future I would just half the recipe for the crust base so that there’s more lemon.  Always more lemon. 




    Lemon Posset

    There’s this lovely lemon posset which has a texture similar to panna cotta.  It has 3 ingredients and is very simple to make.  The dessert is thick, creamy and rich.  You should probably add some chopped fresh rosemary or thyme too.  This is not intensely tart, so you can serve it to non-princesses as well. 





    Lemon Cake Roll

    For those that don’t want to be punched in the face by a lemon, the lemon cake roll is a perfect light dessert.  It’s for non-princesses and princesses alike. 



    Source: treatsandmeats

  2.  

    Egg Rolls

    Hello! This post will be about crunchy, delicious egg rolls! Before that, I wanted to say that I turned my salads and chocolate post into handy dandy prints!  

    Chocolates and Tempering Print

    Salads Print

    I also have other stuff sold at my Society6 page too.  Thanks and enjoy this post :) 

    ——————————————————————————————————————-

    My mom would enlist my help as a kid (ie: free labor and there’s nothing wrong with that) when she’d make her egg rolls. 





    Her egg rolls are really, really good. Her friends love them and she is known for them.  In no way do I claim for them to be truly authentic (considering she immigrated from Vietnam, I don’t really care if they are).  Whatever they are, she adapted them from her mom and they are really good. 



    She gave me the very fun task of exercising fine motor skills of tearing apart the incredibly delicate spring roll skins from the brick of existing ones.  When I was a kid, this felt like an exercise in frustration, a step up from shelling pounds of shrimp for my mom and removing that little “line” from the body.   






    That’s one of the things that makes these egg rolls really tasty.  It is almost a creepy, Buffalo Bill skin-like texture of the spring roll skins that make them crispy crunchy—not floury, puffy or thick.   

    You can tell you’ve picked the right ones if one spring roll skin is whisper thin and translucent, like these guys. Scroll down to Spring Roll Wraps.  Those are the droids you’re looking for.  Click here for image!  

    They come frozen and you have to heat them for about 30 seconds to a minute to loosen them up.  As a kid my mom took particular delight and sometimes frustration at seeing me inevitably muck the first few up prying them apart from the thawing brick. 





    My mom would then step in and show me how to do it properly.  With her years of experience on mine, she made it look easy.  She’d pull, gently tug at a corner with one hand and somehow flick her wrist and the skin would easily fly up, freed from the brick.  






    Later on, I first made my mom’s egg rolls for a few of my friends and Tubbs.  



    They really liked it.   



    They wanted me to make them as much as possible. 

    There’s a reason I don’t like making them.  While they are tasty, I’m in no way good at frying them.  The sizzle and crackle of oil leaping everywhere as you gently lower those suckers into the pan is still slightly stressful.   I should probably take a few tips from Steamy Kitchen’s excellent post on egg rolls. 




    They also stink up the house.  Now you might think that’s a good thing, but after that smell (or any food type smell for that matter) lingers for a week it becomes more than a little unpleasant.  

    Not to mention the rolling.   I just spent 4 hours the other day cranking out 75 of them.  I thought I should take my trough of 5 lbs of meat and skins to the dining table and make A Game of Thrones marathon out of it, but I decided against it and used it as a meditation therapy instead.  



    I became zen-like, trying to peel and pluck the skins from the skin brick then roll them as quickly and neatly as I could.  Eventually I was pulling the spring roll skins as quick as my mom, finally getting it.  After still, messing up the first few tugs at the spring roll brick. 







    However, after taking them out of the hot oil, letting them cool on a cookie rack and rolling it up in a crisp leaf of lettuce and dipping it into fish sauce, I decided maybe these are worth making. 



    The ingredients for these egg rolls are really basic. This is an adaptation of my mother’s recipe so it’s even further distilled down to a handful of ingredients. 

    The food list is as follows: spring roll skins, carrots, onions, green cabbage, oyster sauce, eggs, lean ground pork, and cracked black pepper.  Also, a few cartons of canola oil for frying.  


    Accompaniments: fish sauce, sugar, white vinegar and water (to make fish sauce), crisped red leaf lettuce (read my Salads post..eh? :D), cucumbers, cilantro, and mint. 







    Equipment    : at least 2 inch thick pan for frying, a pair of chopsticks or metal tongs,  vegetable peeler, cutting board, chef’s knife, a cookie sheet wrapped with aluminum and a wire rack on top, and a food processor (for your sanity), colander, a few plastic ware at least 9 inches width and 4-6 inches high, and at least 75 pieces of parchment paper cut up, large container (holds 40 cups or 9.4 l) . 

    Fish sauce: makes 1 cup 

    5 TB sugar

    3 TB water 

    1/3 c fish sauce 

    1/2 c white vinegar 

    optional: chile paste, lime juice, lemon juice, siracha, chopped shallots and chopped garlic for more moxie 

    Throw everything into a small pot, heat on low heat and stir occassionally until sugar is fully dissolved.  Taste.  Add  more stuff to your liking.  Store in glass jar and be careful not to spill any on you, because it stinks. 







    Eggrolls: makes approximately 70 slightly chubby egg rolls 

    -2, 50 count packages of Spring Roll Pastry, frozen (keep them in the freezer) 

    -6 eggs at room temperature 

    -2 3/4 c Oyster Sauce (you’ll need about 2 18 oz bottles) 

    -5 small onions 

    -2 lbs of carrots 

    -2 lbs of green cabbage 

    -5 lbs of lean ground pork (90% lean) 

    -lots of freshly ground black pepper 

    -2 cartons of oil for frying 




    So about the ground pork—I grabbed 70% ground pork and it has a silkier, richer texture but doesn’t have the tang and oomph that is normally present when I make them.  You can choose to make it with 70% fat but I prefer the leaner stuff.  




    I like to get my little ducks in a row, so first thing we’re going to do is prep all of those vegetables.  The most bothersome being the carrots.   Peel all of your carrots, then chop off the ends.  Wash thoroughly in the colander and then wipe dry. 




    Use the grate attachment of your food processor, or use a box grater, and grate all of the carrots. 




    Empty them out into the large container. 



    On to the cabbage.  Peel outer skin and discard.  Cut the cabbage in half.  Remove the core. 



    Cut again into quarters.  Then, cut horizontally into 8 small pieces per quarter. 





    Using the food processor again, throw the cabbages pieces in the shredder until they are all finely grated. If you don’t have a food processor, you can chop them up finely with a chef’s knife. 




    Throw the cabbage in with the carrots in the massive food trough. 




    On to the onions! Cut the onions in half, and then cut the tops off. Then peel all of the skins, and chop finely.   

     




    Try not to cry like a little baby in the process.  I consistently fail at this part. 





    Throw them into the food trough with the carrots and cabbages. 

    At this point, it’s a good break for clean-up.  I usually wash everything up (the food processor, knives, cutting boards and vegetable peeler) and dry it and put it away.  





    A certain someone, that oh I dunno, will remain unnamed, likes to cook as if an atom bomb exploded in the kitchen. 




    The certain someone can cook some pretty darn well so it always slides that you could hide a dead body in the aftermath. I still brace myself before peering into the kitchen.  







    I like cleaning up as I cook. 

    With the vegetables prep finished comes the more fun stuff.  Crack all 6 eggs into a large bowl, then tip them into the food trough. 



    Measure out the Oyster sauce (if you haven’t already) and also tip into the food trough.  





    Add some crack blacked pepper, maybe 20 turns or so of the pepper grinder. 

    At this point, if you might want to swap into a slightly crappy short sleeved shirt or whip an apron on.  Wash your hands and then tear open the pork and add that to the massive trough.  




    With your bare hands, get all up in there and mix it thoroughly by hand.  Swoop your arm down in there and squish the meat, eggs, oyster sauce and veggies all together until it is one homogeneous mixture.  This make take a few minutes and some elbow grease.    




    Wash your hands. 





    Now dip a teaspoon sized amount out of the massive glob and plop it onto a microwave safe plate. 




    Nuke it in the microwave for 30 to 40 seconds (always err on the lower side of cooking times).  


    With a fork, cut open the meat and make sure it’s thoroughly cooked, no pink(if it’s still pink, nuke it in 5 second spurts so it doesn’t burn).  Wait a few seconds to cool. 



    Taste. 

    Add more black pepper or oyster sauce to your desired taste.   The heating of a tiny bit of meat mixture makes it easy for me to know what it will taste like.  The measurements I provided are to my own taste, so adjust for yours or even add other stuff if you so choose. 

    Assembly:  

    Have your meat trough ready with a plate and a tablespoon nearby.  Have a big, clear working counter space.  Line your sheet pan with aluminum and put a wire rack on it.  Have a few Tupperware containers at hand and your parchment pieces ready.  Also have a plate large enough to hold the spring roll skins. 


    Here comes the fun part! Rolling and picking out those finicky skins one by one from their defrosting, clumped brick. I’ll do my best to describe how to pry those skins apart from one another. 


    First, take one of the packages of frozen spring rolls and put it directly into the microwave oven.  Don’t open the bag, don’t cut it, just throw it in there. 




    Nuke it for about 30 seconds.  

    Nuke it for about 10-15 more seconds. 

    Cut open the package and discard.  Place your clump of spring roll skins onto a plate.  




    Look at one of the corners. 



    This is where you will pick and flick with your fingernail like a scab, the very first spring roll skin.  Find space between the dough and dig gently with your finger and your fingernail—don’t tear, just flick.
     



    With your thumb and index finger, very, very gently tug back in the opposite direction. 




    The stack of spring roll skins are still defrosting, so the first bunch of skins are going to still be rigid and difficult to pry apart without tearing.  It’s okay if you tear a few (I certainly did).

    What you’re going to want to do next is with your thumbs and index fingers grab the skin, and pull and tug gently in very, very tiny increments, with the most resistance being at the base where the skin is closest to the rest of the stack, in the opposite direction.   





    Use your thumb underneath one side of the skin, with the rest of your fingers on the top side, to brush up against the bottom of the stack to loosen the skin from the rest, making sure to gently, in small tugs, pull, pull, pull at the corners and the center as well of the skin. 

    I hope the images help.  After you get the first one done and pulled (with no tears hopefully, if not don’t sweat it. Try again and remember the skin is desperately clinging on to dear life to avoid being the vessel for porky goodness) place it in diamond shape, with a corner facing you.  





    Filling time.  Take your tablespoon and scoop into the meat mixture about 2-3 TB generous meat and place it just half an inch from the corner of the spring roll closest towards you. 





    Shape it into a log with the back of your spoon by mushing it around. 




    Now take that corner closest towards you and turn it so that it folds on top of the meat mixture.   





    Place each hand on one side of the egg roll.  With your thumbs, cradle the bottom and roll the spring roll around so that all you see is the top, left and right corner.  It should look like a meat filled envelope with the top opened.  







    Take the left corner  and pull to the right so that it lays on top of the meat part. 




    Take the right corner and pull it to the left so that it lays on top of the meat part.



     

    Roll it into a log shape.  







    Now open back up the only corner visible, and about one inch downward take the back of your meat spoon and slide it against the roll so some of the remainder meat juice/moisture seals it up.   Alternatively, you can use a beaten egg and brush to seal it up as well.  




    Wrap the bottom of the egg roll in parchment place in Tupperware container.   





    Turn into a Zen-focused, spring-roll-skin-picking, meat-rolling-machine-until it is all gone.   




    Currently I have two large Tupperware containers filled with frozen egg rolls.  I’m not sure how long they keep.  For the rest, you can fry them up.  Here’s the frying part! 

    Frying: 

    Have that pan with the wire rack and aluminum foil ready?  Good.  Get your pan with the 2-inch thick depth and your cartons of frying oil.    Get your tongs.  Oh, you might want to put on an apron too at this point if you didn’t tear it off after rolling all those darned things.   

    Heat your oven to 200 F too. 





    Turn on the heat in your pan to medium-high and add oil until it’s about 1 and a 1/2 inches in depth. 




    Ideally you should wait until oil is 350 F(see Steamy Kitchen’s post), or you can wait until oil begins to ripple and a flick of a few droplets of water causes it to sizzle and sputter.  

    Gently lower your egg rolls into the oil and make sure not to crowd the pan.  They should start sizzling and crackling away.  Set the timer for 2 minutes.



     Flip and fry again for 2 minutes. 



    Flip again, and fry for 3-4 minutes.



     Flip and fry again for 3-4 minutes.





     

    Take one of the egg rolls out and let it dry on the wire rack for a few seconds.  Take a knife and cut the egg roll in half.   Look at the insides.  Is it pink? No? Then they’re done.   This is how my mom checked to see if they were done and by golly that’s how I do it too.
     



    Take the remaining egg rolls out onto the rack.  Place it into the oven to keep warm while you cook off the remainder. 




    Eating: 

    Get some paper towels handy to absorb the grease.   You can either just eat them as is or you can eat it how my mom likes to eat it (and me too). 

    Get some red leaf lettuce, chopped cucumber, cilantro and mint.  Put it on your dinner plate.  Put some fish sauce in a dipping bowl.  




    Cut up the egg rolls with a knife into one-inch pieces.   

    Tear some red leaf lettuce, place an egg roll piece into the red leaf.  Then take some cucumber and herbs and roll it up into the leaf.  Dip into fish sauce. 




    Eat and enjoy. 

    For the cooked egg rolls, you can store them in Tupperware in the fridge.  To reheat, preheat your oven to 425 F.  Microwave your egg rolls for two minutes.  Then place them on a wire rack on a cookie sheet lined with foil and bake for 10-12 minutes a side.   

    I hope you guys try these egg rolls.  They’re pretty tasty.  You can certainly halve the recipe if you don’t want massively scaled egg rolls, but I can’t vouch for the ratios.  If you do half it, I’d err on the lower/smaller quantity of oyster sauce since over salting it would pretty much ruin the batch.   You can always add more oyster sauce later. 

    These egg rolls were a part of my childhood and ( slightly begrudgingly) my adult life.  While I do enjoy them after I make them, these are a big factory labor of love.   There is nothing more gratifying though when I hear the crunch of the skins as I bite into one, surrounded by mounds of lettuce and herb and the tang of fish sauce as it hits my tongue.    

    Source: treatsandmeats

  3.  

    Salads

    Note: Hello readers! I am flattered so many of y’all liked the Chocolate and Tempering post! I will keep that in mind for the upcoming posts.

     In the meanwhile, I’ve followed up with the opposite of chocolate: Salads.   (at this point I expect most people to continue scrolling through their dashboard :D)  Salads need some love.  

    Onward! 

    I love salads.  There was a time when I used to hate salads. 






    I was fortunate in growing up to have home cooked meals, but my family also had convenience meals.   Salads and my exposure to them as a child, were lumped into the convenience category.





    I type this because I remember as a child, a salad looking like this:
     




     It was all I knew as a child.  Refrigerated tomatoes (because they kept longer that way), a head of iceberg lettuce roughly chopped (because it was inexpensive and my family wanted food to stretch) and ranch dressing (also inexpensive). 

    Tubbs on the other hand, had a wider vegetable knowledge base to draw from when making salads.  





    When Tubbs and I were dating early on, he had stated he was going to make a salad for dinner. 







    My inner thoughts: 





    It didn’t seem filling, that kind of salad, the one I was raised with, for dinner.  But, I was interested to see what he would make.  I didn’t know his definition was vastly different from mine. 





    Red leaf, green leaf and romaine lettuce.  His family would buy whole heads of lettuce, soak them in a large bowl of water for a few minutes (so the grit and dirt would sink to the bottom), drain, then crisp them in between sheets of paper towels. 












     I’ve found something far more reusable than paper towels, salad sacs .  I have 3.  They are great if you want to make it easier to incorporate salads into your life.  No, I was not paid endorse their product. 




    Needed texture and crunch? Get red cabbage (also for beautiful color).
     



    More texture…sweet bits and other things? Tomatoes, carrots, red peppers, or roasted jarred red peppers. Want fruit in it? Berries, sliced apples and pears work too.  





    Use some raddichio if you want more color and bitterness in your salad. 




    If you are fortunate to be in an area with abundant produce, there are different types of tomatoes you can choose from. 




    What about protein and fats? This is a dinner salad.  Tubbs would add one or more, depending on his mood, of these: avocado, feta cheese, goat cheese, cheddar cheese, sliced deli meats, rotisseree chicken, nuts, seeds, and beans.  I almost forgot: soft-boiled or hard boiled eggs!
     


















    The world is your oyster with a salad.  You can throw the kitchen sink and it still taste great, or cherry-pick any items for a very restrained, specific taste. 

    Salad dressing? Either a bottle of your choice vinaigrette—Tubbs likes Wishbone Red Wine Vingairette or you can make one from scratch (very tasty). 

    And so at his place, for dinner I saw him lay down a plate of beautiful things, things I had never recognized in a salad or that . 







    After exposure to and eating one of Tubbs’ beautiful salads, I knew that salads could be far more nutritious, far more FLAVORFUL and enjoyable(!) than I could ever imagine.  




    EDIT:  Created a lovely Salads prep and components idea poster on Society6! Salads Poster

  4.  

    Chocolate and Tempering

    I used to not really be a chocolate kind of person.   There are friends I know that hold chocolate as a sacred gift, a holy thing.  

    Not to be messed with, not to be dissed or dismissed or spoken of negatively in any kind of way whatsoever. 



    A few years ago, I would shrug and go “Meh, chocolate.  I’ve got citrus.  I’m a citrus kind of gal.” 

    I still am.  I love anything so tart that it makes your toes curl and your hair stand on end.  



    But that’s another post! 

    I’ve been casually learning how to temper chocolate.  And I say this on a non-professional, amateur noob level.

     
    Professional level stuff is kind of scary.  I’ve peeked at a few recipes and they are not the recipes that you or I know of.  It’s weight, grams, ratios and a few blurbs of lines.  




    They assume you know and have memorized basic stuff.  Techniques, temperatures..all memorized.  The chemical reasons WHY you are doing certain things or manipulating heat to change crystal structures of sugar and chocolate.  My hats are off to you professionals! You guys are awesome. 

    I am a souless robot, and I will always, at the very least, need to look at a recipe for SOME kind of inspiration.  And I’m ok with that.  For now. 

    That being said, being able to temper chocolate at home is pretty awesome.  I feel like a tiny creator of a magnificent, shiny treasure. 



    It takes your home baking to Another Level.   It also elevates chocolate rather as a mere flavor into its own delightful course.  It’s shiny, brittle, crisp and it snaps and makes this wonderful noise when you bite into a tempered chocolate piece. 

    On the other hand, it’s a HUGE pain.  

    Things I have learned (the hard way and the easy way)  when you want to temper chocolate:

    • WATER IS YOUR NUMBER 1 ENEMY—never ever let it touch chocolate, EVER
    • Avoid Humidity or tempering on humid days 
    • Set Aside Uninterruptable Quiet Time when tempering chocolate, and plenty of space 
    • Have a really good digital thermometer or candy thermometer handy 
    • Chocolate doesn’t like to be man-handled, be delicate 
    • Gently stir the  chocolate to avoid air bubbles 
    • Polycarbonate molds or silicone molds are best when trying to make chocolate pieces, wash them and dry THOROUGHLY just before filling or dust/flecks will appear on your chocolates! 
    • Plan ahead when making filled chocolates
    • Have parchment paper on hand or a spoon 
    • Be Patient 
    • Seriously, be really patient






    I think I started getting into it because chocolates are the only dessert that Tubbs has a weakness for.  I have made cakes, cookies, pastry and puddings, and almost always he can pass on them. 




    Which made me sad for a while because I love baking.  I love putting in effort and seeing a direct result, be it a failure or success, of my efforts. 

    Now that I can make chocolates on a basic level, I think Tubbs has a fear for his waistline.

     

    I’ve looked up quite a few (see here, here, here, here and here) methods in to how to temper chocolate, and what I will detail is sort of a mix of two methods as well as some of my own tips and tricks.   

    If you haven’t read the links, tempering pretty much results in crisp, shiny smooth chocolate that snaps when broken and does not melt at room temperature (room temperature defined as  60 to 65 degrees). 



    Tempering usually consists of a first heat to a very high temperature, then a rapid cool down, then a gently heat towards anywhere from 87-91 degrees F depending on the type of chocolate.  

    You can tell your temper is successful if you dip a tiny nip of parchment, or slather the back of a teaspoon with a thin layer of chocolate and place it in the fridge for a few minutes.  If it is shiny and smooth, and snaps when broken,  then you have successfully tempered.  

    I’m using here a mix of Joe Pastry’s tempering and David Lebovitz’s method mashed together.  

    EQUIPMENT! 

    Do not proceed without a fairly accurate digital thermometer, plastic/silicone or polycarbonate molds if you’re a high roller and really want to get into it (or plain ol parchment paper placed on a baking sheet), spoon for stirring, one bowl for water, a bowl to melt and hold your chocolate, cutting board, chef’s knife, a plate to hold your thermometer and wooden spoon and a few paper towels. 

    Also, make sure EVERYTHING is BONE DRY.  No water whatsoever should touch the chocolate and if it does you pretty much can’t temper with it or make chocolates.  You’ll have to use new chocolate and start from scratch. 

    In case it does seize.



    Also make sure you have some uninterrupted time.  DO NOT WALK AWAY from anything when tempering chocolate.   It’s a fickle beast that is very sensitive to temperatures.  If you are uncomfortable with the thought of spending dedicated time (upwards to half an hour to an hour) then DO NOT proceed! Tempering chocolate is DEFINITELY not for the impatient OR the unfocused.  I know it sounds overly paranoid but it’s true. 


    Since Tubbs and I are unabashed chocolate snobs, the following method and temperatures are listed for dark chocolate.  Shirley Corriher  mentions other temperatures if you want to temper milk or dark, so refer to those temperatures if you are doing anything other than dark.

     


    The above is what I used to temper chocolate.  It’s a combination of the microwave and a bowl of tap cold water (filled VERY low)  with a few ice cubes thrown in.   

    Since I’m using a bowl  containing water to alter the temperature, I made VERY sure that the bowl I have that is holding my chocolate is very high so that there is no chance of water from the shallow bowls reaching it.  

    That being said, also be careful when you are using your hands to move the bowls and that condensation from outside of the bowls does not reach your fingers, which could also accidentally brush up against the interior of the chocolate bowl.  Also make sure your chocolate bowl fits into the shallow bowl. 


    Have  your shallow bowl filled very low with cold tap water.  Throw a few ice cubes in.  Keep it at a low level, since when you put your  chocolate bowl into the shallow bowl, the water will rise and you don’t want the water to accidentally spill over.  




    First, take whatever amount of chocolate you have.  If it’a chocolate bar/brick, chop it up into evenly small pieces as you can with a chef’s knife on a cutting board. 



    If you have chocolate chips (discs/callets) then you’re pretty set.  It’s highly recommended to get the best quality you can afford.  At the moment I’m using Trader Joe’s 1lb brick of 72% dark chocolate.  It doesn’t nearly have the depth of flavor say Guittard or Callebaut has, but since I’m a noobie and it’s also quite inexpensive I’m fine with it.  





    Now that you have your chopped pieces of chocolate, set aside 1/3 of it in a bowl or a cup.  We’re going to be using the 1/3 for the cool down part of the tempering.  


    The remainder 2/3 chocolate put in your melting bowl with high sides.  To heat the chocolate, I used the microwave. I have a 950 watt microwave and I heat the chocolate at 30 second intervals.  Please adjust and err on the side of LOWER time so you do not accidentally scorch or burn your chocolate.  YMMV with these intervals, adjust accordingly to your microwave! 




    Microwave your chocolate for 30 seconds or less.  

    After EVERY 30 seconds of heat, take the bowl out of the microwave and gently stir with your spoon.  Stir for about 10 seconds.  Residual heat from the bowl will continue to raise the temperature.
     

    There is no set amount of times that you have to do this, but after EVERY blast of heat, take it out of the microwave, gently stir, and use your thermometer to check the temperature.

    You’re looking for 120 f. If you get close to 117 it’s probably fine, just keep stirring since it will most likely keeping crawling upwards.  Microwave at lower power and/or lower time.  That’s the first heat! 





    The next part is rapid cool down.   With your chocolate bowl on your counter, next to the cold shallow tap water filled bowl, add the 1/3 set aside chocolate into your melted chocolate.  



    Now, stir gently and not too quickly (to prevent getting air bubbles in your chocolate).  Keep stirring until all of the chocolate is thoroughly melted.  This may take a few minutes. 




    After the chocolate is fully stirred, CAREFULLY set your chocolate bowl into the cold tap water bowl, making sure not to get any water into the chocolate bowl.  If you’re concerned you’ve got water on your hands, have a towel nearby to wipe your hands dry.  



    Stir the chocolate in the cold tap water for a few seconds, and check the temperature again.  





    You’re going to Cool down the chocolate to 82-84 F.  As the temperature nears 85-86 F it’s safe to take the bowl out of the cold tap water and keep gently stirring. 


    Now back to heating it up, but gently and at 89 F.  I microwave at 20-30% power at 5-7 second intervals, stirring after EVERY interval and checking the temperature with the thermometer. 

    I know it’s more of a pain this way, but you get to control the heat. It is FAR better to have it slowly rise upward in temperature to 89 F than it is to jump up past the desired temperature, otherwise you will have to start the WHOLE tempering process again.  I have been impatient and done it once, I promise you you do not want to do it again! 


    To test the tempered chocolate, dip the back of a spoon into the chocolate bowl.  Then set the spoon in the fridge for a few minutes.  If it is shiny and glossy, the chocolate is probably properly tempered! 

    Congratulations! You have probably done one of the most fickle, pain in the butt things to do.  I felt a huge sense of accomplishment when I first did it.  It’s not professional, but in relative terms of the home baker I think it’s a pretty great achievement.  



    The possiblities are endless from here on out.  

    If you have chocolate molds, you can fill them and then also make say, a Fondant filling and add oils to suit your tastes.   The only downside is you’d need to do a second temper to cap off the chocolate molds. 

    You could also make a ganache and add flavorings to that as well.   You could infuse the cream with herbs or oils then make the ganache as directed.  

    Or a peanut butter filling.

    You could also just use it to cover fruit like strawberries, raspberries, or apples.  





    When covering fruit, make sure the fruit is at ROOM temperature and absolutely bone dry. 

    I made the mistake of adding tempered chocolate to strawberries directly out of the fridge and well, the result wasn’t too pretty.  It was still tasty, but definitely not appealing visually.  

    I hope this helps you decide in whether or not you want to decide to temper chocolate on your own, or run away screaming in the other direction! 




    If you are intrigued by the process and wish to proceed further into chocolates, I highly recommend Andrew Shotts’ “Artisan Chocolates.”  It is an incredibly detailed, thorough book on making chocolates.  I have made quite a few of his recipes and they are stellar with very clear instructions! 

    So if there are any professional bakers please feel free to ping me with corrections, I admit that I am human and might’ve made mistakes, so sorry in advance! 

    I hope this helps for those interested in learning the tempering process! 


    EDIT: I turned this post into a quick cheat sheet that you can purchase as a poster from my Society6 page if you so choose! Treats and Meats Tempering Poster

  5.  

    A Jar of Prego Sauce Recipe

    *disclaimer: I’m not a professional cook/baker, nor was I bribed/paid by Campbell’s Soup Company or Prego to promote or advertise their brand.  

    This is a recipe that Tubbs made up.  He’s pretty cool like that—he’s the cook and I prefer to bake.  He cooks from the hip and loves to improvise.  


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     One of his favorite store bought things is Prego sauce.  He used to heat it up for us and just serve it over pasta for dinners, but then he decided to add some meat to it.   

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    This place is a judgement free zone where you will possibly see in the future posts about Miracle Whip, cereal for dinner and Kraft Macaroni and Cheese.  If mere mention of those products scared you, I suggest you back away slowly and never return.  

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    On the OTHER hand, you will also see posts about meat, cheese and glorious alcyhols as well as vegetables and dinner salads.  

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    This is a place where I want both of types of things/foods to coexist in harmony.  Peanut butter in your chocolate, chocolate in your peanut butter.  The universe won’t explode. 

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    FOCUS. Okay, so back to the jar of Prego. 
    There is nothing wrong with Prego.  This is a semi-homemade recipe but it’s pretty tasty and you can most certainly modify or add more ingredients to your taste. 
    Want to make it? READ ON! 

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    Cast of characters as above, so below: 
    Prep: 5-10 minutes
    Cook: 20-35 minutes 
    Serves: Four 4 largeish portions or 6 portions for tiny bird stomachs or served with side salads 
    1 24 oz Jar Prego 
    1 to 2 Tablespoons Olive Oil 
    1 large onion chopped, approximately 2 cups 
    4 to 6 gloves of chopped garlic, or more 
    1 lb ground beef 92% preferred
    1/2 - 1  teaspoon dried thyme
    1/4 teaspoon sweet paprika 
    3 to 5 Tablespoons  Worcestershire sauce
    salt (kosher) and pepper, to taste 
    Equipment: Large skillet with at least 1 inch depth 

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     Having everything prepped and in little bowls and thingamadoobobs is nice.  Keep the dried thyme, paprika and Worcestershire bottles on hand in case you want to add more to suit your personal preferences.  

    Step 1: Add 1 to 2 TB of Olive Oil to your skillet over medium high heat.


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    Step 2: Sprinkle  a few drops of water on your skillet and if it crackles, add the chopped garlic to the pan and stir frequently until fragrant.   Cooking and stirring your garlic centralized in a tiny place will help cook evenly and cook faster.

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    Step 3: Add onion to pan and stir.  Distribute the garlic evenly and all over the pan. Sprinkle a wee bit, a wee pinch, of kosher salt over your onions and garlic.  Crack some ground pepper in there too.  Stir everything and cook until the onions are soft and transluscent, about 5-7 minutes. 


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    Step 4: Add ground beef to pan and break up with your stirring implement.   Mix everything together, and sprinkle a little bit more salt over everything.  Now sprinkle the sweet paprika and dried thyme over everything.  Brown the meat.  

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    Step 5:  After the meat is cooked, grab a spoon and taste a wee bit of it.  The meat should be slightly too salty.  If not, add in small pinches and sprinkle kosher salt over it until it is. 

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    Step 6: Just slightly salty? Good! Now add the jar of Prego and stir thoroughly. 

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    Step 7: Stir and watch the sauce and bring it to a boil, then reduce the heat to low and let it simmer, stirring occasionally, for approximately 10 minutes or so or until slightly thickened. 

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    Step 8: Taste the sauce after it has simmered away.  Does it need more salt or black pepper? Add away! 

    Serve with cooked pasta. 
    It’s an easy recipe that Tubbs makes often.  We delight in leftovers since there’s only two of us.  I like this sauce so much I could probably just eat as if it were a big bowl of chili. 

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    If you want to feel slightly less guilty, serve it with a side salad, like some torn up green leaf lettuce and chopped romaine with grape tomatoes and Parmesan grated over it with a micro plane.  Eat the salad first, then dig in to the pasta. 

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    The tweakening: it’s always fun to tweak recipes to your taste, so feel after making it as is on the first pass to add your own seasonings! Maybe fresh basil at the end, or want more earthiness? Add some dried oregano.  Not sweet enough? Add a little bit of sugar.   I could also see chopped sun dried tomatoes thrown in for a more piquant sweetness! 

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     Hope you guys try it out and enjoy!  

    Source: treatsandmeats

  6.  

    The Search for the Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie

    I don’t think I ever have, or ever will find the perfect chocolate chip cookie.

    I’ve seen perfect cookies proclaimed by many food sites or blogs as their newest (note: NEWEST) favorite recipe.  Is it an elusive goal that we purposefully will never reach? An ideal cookie? It’s pretty deep, man.  


     

    What have I seen? 
    Vanilla pudding mix cookies. 


    Browned butter cookies. 

    All butter as fat for the cookies. 


    All shortening as fat for the cookies.


    Half shortening, half butter as the fat for the cookies. 


    There are also gilded lily cookies (among other things…burgers I’m looking at YOU), where every ingredient is pristine and made from the hands of Greybeards on a Mountain on High (I never resort to hyperbole ever!). 



    There’s also methods/techniques.  You bake the cookies, then keep it wrapped up in a container for 24 hours to achieve ultimate softness and chewiness. I would love to try that cookie, but I am inconsistently impatient.  Sure I’ll wait for bread dough and let THAT sit overnight, but not for a cookie.  It makes as little sense to you as it does to me. 




    There’s letting the dough sit and rest in the fridge. 

    There’s also timing.  When is it too soon and when is it over baked or to the point where it becomes as hard as a rock the next day? All chocolate chip cookies taste great out of the oven.  The trying times are the next day, the ultimate testing ground. 




    This recipe does fine by me.  I’ve made it with almond extract and honestly I prefer  the recipe without it, but I never really get to cook it because I’ve found the best chocolate chip cookie is the one that only makes it as far as the fridge. 


     

    Source: treatsandmeats

  7.  

    Introduction

    Introduction 1

    Hello! Welcome to treatsandmeats…this is going to be a food blog.  I’ve resisted making a food blog for a really long time.  I love food and there are a LOT of food blogs out there…so many great ones actually.

    I’m not sure what to do with this yet as this is something I’ve started purely for myself and for fun.  As to why this exists, why not? Might as well for fun!   

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    I’m Blubs on the left.  The guy on the right is Tubbs.  Just to make it easier for when I refer to him.  He’s a pretty good guy, imo.  I might be biased.  The name for this blog came from him! 

     

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    This is a place to basically let my brain prattle on and on about food, with some doodles done by me thrown in for good measure.  It might change or evolve into something else, but for now that’s what I have in mind.  As you can see above my interested are divided as such. 
    Tubbs cooks meat pretty dang well.  I make  treats (mostly) pretty well.  Sometimes I make horrible horrible mistakes, such as tapioca pudding that could be thrown at a wall and bounce right back at you.  But mistakes happen and I’m pretty sure I don’t think I’ll ever overcook pudding like that ever again.  Live and learn! 

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    That’s it for this post! Nice to meet you! 

    Source: treatsandmeats